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Floor boards and broken dreams
Life is never as simple as the fairy tale seems
I drew you a picture
But it fell through the cracks
And my fingers aren't that small

Last week I fixed the whole in the wall
Plaster, nails I did it all
Tried to hang a picture of me and you
Swung the hammer and it broke right through
Atleast the pictures okay.

Yesterday the ceiling sprung a leak
I patched the hole
It should last all week
I have a pot placed underneath
And now the pot is full

Last night the window wouldn't close
Slept all night with frozen toes
Grabbed some wood
To pry it down
Now the glass is broken

Fell through the floor boards again today
I fixed it up
It seemed okay
Tested it out like I have before
Then found the picture I drew you

Floor boards and broken dreams,
Life is never as simple as the fairy tale seems
Fix it all just one more time
Watch it crumble and stand outside
Too bad nothings this perfect
©2005-2009 ~callowness
:iconcallowness:

Author's Comments

everything falls apart.

(a work in progress)

Comments


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:iconpuremyth:
ooooh I really like this. My absolute favourite thing about it is the "lost" final line of each stanza.. the way all the other lines are part of a strong rhythmic structure then it ends with one that just tails off, which creates a "loose end" effect that perfectly matches the subject matter. Like there's always something missing or undone. This is just begging to be illustrated. Can't wait till it's finished.

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Art Is Murder - Executions of Creativity
:iconcallowness:
I'm glad you really like it. I personally liked the style myself but wasn't sure if it would be appealing to the reader or not. Good to know it was appreciated. And thank you for the fav, was not expecting that.
:iconjester81:
wow. Just wow. The flow is amazing. The last stanza though seemingly different than all the others pulls the poem together quite nicely.
:iconcallowness:
The end really was the hardest part, with a poem like this no ending could really suffice. But you've reassured me that I was on the right track. Thank you for your comment. This one is special to me.

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.x. bring your words to the river and throw yourself in .x.
:iconwhatsin-aname:
Oh my goodness Steph....this is by far one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. I absolutely love it, it's a definite fav! Just amazing!

Stephanie:floating:
:iconcallowness:
I am glad you enjoyed this peice. Thank you for your comment and for the :+fav:

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.x. bring your words to the river and throw yourself in .x.

Details

September 27, 2005
1.2 KB
68.1 KB
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